How to Be Happier With Yourself

21 simple self-care practices to boost mindfulness and reduce stress when life feels difficult and lonely

When your heart is broken, recovery is hard.

Well-meaning friends and work colleagues send texts and memes encouraging you to “smile” and “be positive” and remind you “everything happens for a reason”.

You know that.

You want to be happy.

You want to move on, be gentle to yourself, “get better,” “let go of the pain,” and feel more alive and happy inside, yet you’re stuck.

You are tired of living.

Tired of endless sleepless nights, lugging your body around, a fake smile on your lips, and the ever-ready response, “Hello. Yes, I’m fine. How are you?”.

Overcoming Self-Doubt

You’ve been stuck for such a long time in this pit, the tightness in your chest and weakness in your legs, any time you get up, feels normal.

Being happy again and caring for yourself seems like such a long journey.

You don’t know how to look after yourself, be happy and get out of this loop of despair; it’s easier to stay locked in pain, unhappy and lonely.

This article is here to gently remind your body and brain that having a sense of vitality, aliveness, caring for yourself and connecting with others is also a natural part of who you are.

Even a tiny, lively shift in your energy can help you be kinder to yourself by lowering feelings of hopelessness, despair and loneliness.

How do I know?

Embracing Self-Love in Challenging Times

Unexpectedly, losing my brother and my cousin in 1997 and 1995, experiencing a miscarriage in 1992, and going through a horrible divorce left me scared, shaky and struggling to breathe.

The 21 self-care tips I share are practices I have used over the past 20 -plus years and suggested by friends, guides, and mentors who helped me get back on my feet, restore my zest for life, and be kinder and happier with myself.

As I said, the self-care tips aren’t a panacea; there are still days when I struggle to fall asleep and wake up feeling lost, restless and tired.

All these 21 self-care tips for happiness can do is soften and release the pain, making it easier for us to get up, face the world, and do the bare minimum to get by as we regain our sense of being happy and alive.

So, with that in mind, let’s look at these 21 self-care tips you can try today, to help you feel better.

21 Self-Care Tips For Nurturing Self-love and Happiness

Rest when tired to restore your body.
Accept yourself when you feel low.
Accept others as they are when they upset you.
Love the planet and know we are blessed.
Love yourself — warts and all.
Breathe out when in pain to release the bind.
Breathe out when the sun shines to open your heart.
Meditate to soothe and calm your body.
Practice yoga nidra for deep rest and nurture your spirit.
Drink water to hydrate and nourish your cells.
Wash your feet to sink into your body.
Declutter your space to bring new life to your home.
Rub your palms together and cup your warm hands over your eyes to soothe the tightness around your eyes.
Walk softly on the Earth, one mindful step at a time — to ground your energy and restore your connection with the Earth.
Listen to the wind, the rain, and the sun bouncing through the air to awaken your senses to the beauty around your heart.
Shake and flap your hands to energise your body and lift your spirits.
Hug yourself to rekindle self-love and tenderness.
Place your hands on your heart centre and whisper, “I love you.”
Slow down to give your brain a chance to reset and recalibrate
Write down your top ten fears say them aloud, and add, “I deeply love and accept myself even though I am (name fear) to witness yourself.
Rest when tired.

BONUS + Integrated Practice

Rinse and repeat your favourite self-care for happiness tip.

Conclusion: Embracing Self-love and Happiness is a Lifelong Journey

Being kind and loving towards ourselves — and others help foster a sense of deep peace and happiness.

However, to sustain this state, we need to be in a community connected with people who love and care about us as we learn to accept and acknowledge ourselves and our emotions and gradually blend the tools and resources into our daily life.

Reflection Question

How did shifting your focus to one of the self-care for happiness tips impact your energy and well-being?

If you feel inspired, please share your insights in the comments below. Thank you.

Want more tips, support, and inspiration to start caring for yourself today?

Click here for your free PDF guide to 21 Affirmations for Self-love and Healing. Thank you.

I originally published this article on Medium where you may read my other inspirational articles.