Right, as you may or may not know I am taking part in a 6 week Bootcamp learning how to be an Alist Blogger …help..I can’t remember the URL or course leaders’ surname…and under normal circumstances I would of stopped and searched through web history for details…but not today.
For today. Right now I am on a mission. A mission to complete my first Quick and Dirty Post. A mission to forget my fears and worries that i am not good enough, forget my fears that others will read my words and judge me accordingly. Forget that first impressions count and surrender.
Surrender to the joys of Frictionless Blogging. Assignment Module 3 ..How to Write Like aPro..how to get em ou t quick and dirty ..maximum efficiency. No edits. No rewind. No rehearsal. Just get it out. Get the ideas flowing out from my head and onto the page.
Scarey..but I am going to do it. I am going to throw caution tot the wind and write. Write the bestest ever – straight from the heart songs of praise ever. I set the time for 20 minutes to write this.
Problem is…my notes. To write Frictionsless Blogging you need a subject, a topic area. A headline. Quick and Dirty doesnt realise pull the audience in, grab their attention. So, if you are still with me, this post is about Overcoming Fear…How I overcome fear. (Usually by now I would have headlines, highlighted texts please stay with me – I am sure time is slipping away and I have so much I want to say)
How I over come my fear. (Bold headline) I dont. I still have fears. Loads of them. I know when I am feeling fearful. I get butterflies in my stomach, my legs start to shake and i feel my jaw throb..like now. Do I relaly have the courage to write this..and publish this. Will I really stop and click submit when the timer on my phone goes. Will I really have faitha nd courage that folk, you, the gentle reader will see this for what it is. Me. learning to let go. Step 2 (maybe) To trust and know that my ebst is good enough. I am good enough. This post. This exercise..(maybe I had better put in a double space to make it easier for the reader to scan…)see I am learning. On a subsconsious level..(red line..spell check….oMG…so many red lines…)I cant publish this. Yes I can. Its just an exercie.y first draft.
No one will know if I secretly edit it..No one will know. But I will. I will know that I have short-changed myself. Not given this exercise a fair whack. You know what. I aint bothered (well I am) but this is a onc ein a lifeti opportunity to write and not care. To have an unfinished..diamond in the rough.. for the whole world to see. There I go again. dreams of being a star blogger..folk rushing to read my posts..get real ntatthu….No. Silence. Voices in the head. Negative talk. Voices which I listened to (point 3..ignore negative self-talk) for too long. No need for folk to say I am not agood writer..say it enough my self. So step 4 must be to learn to trust my inner voice. to silence the inner critic, the nag/perfectionist in me which keeps me from sharing my glory. keeps me feeling small.
We are born to shine. Born to stand out in the crowd. Born to be different to celebrate our uniquesness. Time si flowing. nearly time to click submit. I can feel the fear – i can taste the bitter acid salvia (spell check) and now I ahve a headache.
Why am I doing this. To prove to myself that I can. That i can and shall.
Four minutes to go. wow…time flies when you are having fun. have I really been writing for 20 minutes. Thats how long I meditate, nearly every day. Thats where I gain my strenghth, courage, faith. 20 minutes meditation where i sit quietly, focus within, breathe and give thanks. give thnaks for all the souls and light angels, teachers sent to help me. help you succeed and follow your dream.
so gentle reader, the time is drawing to a close..yeah..i am excited. My first quick and idrty post. And I am going to keep this up a sa record. A tribute to life. To love to courage. to me saying..you knwo what I can do it. and maybe I will complet ethe exercise and revisit. Proof read. add photos (well, I dont know how to do that..maybe i will..fear..icy hands, gripping stomach, trembling knees, shoulders up to ears. Face it ntathu. time is up. submit
Ahhhh, thank you Leah..that is so kind of you. Wow..a proofreader and editor…your fingers must of been itching to correct all the errors!! Thanks for the thumbs up and encouragement. Its strange to re-read this post….your comments help me to release my worries about people judging me. Stay blessed and thx
Ntathu, I love this. I saw your post about yoga in the Alist forum, and I checked out your blog. I remember you posting about this, and finally I read it. Awesome! I have no problem with the typos and so on because you make it clear what it is–a draft, an exercise. And since I'm a proofreader and editor, I see problems in writing all the time–but I also know when I see a diamond that just needs a little polish.
This is good. You definitely have talent. Keep going!
Hugs, Leah
Bless You Aunty…glad you approve…much love and blessings to you and family. Love you Nx